Our TTC Journey

Thursday, March 29, 2012

Weigh In

Week one: 182.0
Week two: 180.6
Week three: 179.6(AF week)
Week four: 178.2
Week five: 179.0 (Provera week)
Week six: 180.0 (AF week)
Week seven: 179.0 (Follistim week)
Week eight: didn't track (Follistim week)
Week nine: didn't track
Week ten: 177.4 (first myfitnesspal week)
Week eleven: 177.4 (AF week)
Week twelve: 174.2
Week thirteen: 175.2
Week fourteen: 173.6

Total lost: 8.4 lbs lost. :)

Saturday, March 24, 2012

A stranger in my house?

About a week and a half ago we encountered a stranger in our house at 3am. I have been a little lazy about posting the story because, well, I've just not felt like typing about it. lol Well, now I am!

It was 3am, we were peacefully sleeping in our bed, with our bedroom door closed and the pups in the crate. All of a sudden I wake up to the noise of our bedroom handle being moved. With a frown on my face, I feel for my husband, he is still in bed. The person promptly opens our bedroom door, turns on the light, says he is sorry, turns off the light, closes the door, and walks out of the house. While the man was doing so, my husband went into training mode after I shook him, and said "Babe!! There's someone in the house!!" Immediately he grabbed his gun, cocked it, and chased this mofo out the door. Imagine how much fear was going through my body. I said outloud, "Don't shoot him." LMAO, I have no clue why, I just knew he wasn't in our house to harm us, because it was weird how he said "sorry" before closing the door to our bedroom. Anyway, my husband (in his underwear) Had hus gun pointed at this man within a matter of seconds (thank you, US Army training). So my husband and this stranger were standing at the front door, i had my head peaked out of our bedroom door looking their way. My husband had his M&P .45 pointed straight at the mans back. My husband asks the man, "Who are you and why the fuck were you in my house?" (I apologize, my husband is quite vulgar.) The man replies with, "I'm Dewayne and I'm staying here for the night." At this point my husband knew the guy was probably drunk, so he put his gun on safe while still pointing it at the man. My husband says, "No the hell you're not, get the fuck out of here." And the man just walked off. My husband proceeded to come back inside the house and checked to make sure nobody else had entered without permission. Nope, house was empty. He also checked for missing items. Nothing missing. He sat on the couch for a second and noticed grass on the couch as well as some puke. We both thought the guy was drunk and probably just had the wrong house (our neighbors house is set up EXACTLY like ours, we know because when we were buying this house, we looked at that house as well because it was for sale at the same time). So, we finally got back to sleep.

In the morning my husband went to the neighbors house to see if he had a buddy of his that stayed over last night. Neighbor said yes, and his buddy had puked in the yard and got lost while trying to make it back to his friends house. lol

The moral of this story is to make sure your front door is locked and you keep the alarm on every night or you might end up with a strange drunk man in your house at 3am.

Let me tell you, it was the scariest thing I have ever went through. My heart was racing at 200bpm. I check the front door at least 2 times before going to bed now. :)

Thursday, March 22, 2012

Weigh in & update

Week one: 182.0
Week two: 180.6
Week three: 179.6(AF week)
Week four: 178.2
Week five: 179.0 (Provera week)
Week six: 180.0 (AF week)
Week seven: 179.0 (Follistim week)
Week eight: didn't track (Follistim week)
Week nine: didn't track
Week ten: 177.4 (first myfitnesspal week)
Week eleven: 177.4 (AF week)
Week twelve: 174.2
Week thirteen: 175.2

Total lost: 6.8 lbs lost.

Yeah, I have no clue why I would gain a pound, especially when I have been running and counting calories like a mad woman every day. It's so annoying. Well until next weigh in, I might make some progress. I think it's because I lost so much last week. Who knows? But I'm not going to let it stop me. I HAVE lost weight, even if it does amount to about a half a pound a week. lol that's something, right??? :D

Not much has been going on in my neck of the woods. I'm trying really hard not to think about TTC. I just keep wrapping my head around trying to become a fit mom and losing this extra weight. Believe me, I have my moments where I truly wish that we could still continue trying - but I know what is best for us. We don't know when/if Scott will even be deployed and wont know until Monday (the 26th) even if it is a yes or no. I'm praying that he stays, but then again, we would make a crap load of money while he would be gone. And he wouldn't be doing any combat missions unless the people of Iran decide to go haywire on their oil situation. They are talking about being deployed to the U.A.E, Dubai or the surround countries by the straight that flows next to Iran and it all has to do with the oil. If he goes, they will pretty much be guards and make sure nothing stupid happens. We will see, but until we know for sure, I am still on my weight loss mission! I don't even know what CD I'm on. Isn't that amazing? I like these breaks. No stress, no expectations, and no hearts broken over a bust cycle. That has happened for the past 5-6 months since the m/c. I think that's all I needed, was a break. TTC gets so stressful when you think about it all the time.

I will surely be updating you when we get news on the deployment. I will be praying in the meantime. <3

Thursday, March 15, 2012

Weigh In :)

Week one: 182.0
Week two: 180.6
Week three: 179.6(AF week)
Week four: 178.2
Week five: 179.0 (Provera week)
Week six: 180.0 (AF week)
Week seven: 179.0 (Follistim week)
Week eight: didn't track (Follistim week)
Week nine: didn't track
Week ten: 177.4 (first myfitnesspal week)
Week eleven: 177.4 (AF week)
Week twelve: 174.2

Total lost: 7.8 lbs lost.

I think my math was wrong last week. Lol, oops! :) I can't believe I lost 3.2 lbs last week. I am so excited! I really love myfitnesspal.com! It is so handy.

Wednesday, March 7, 2012

When will we catch a break?

AF came. My husband is being deployed in the middle of April. We have ONE cycle left. I called my RE to ask about freezing sperm for IUI in possibly August or September. He said no, they don't do that. Only for situations with patients who have cancer and are going to undergo some type of therapy. In my oppinion, I don't understand why they would even do that. I get that people want children. I totally understand that. But what is so different about our situation that you won't do it for us? I know this RE sees TONS of military couples. I'm surprised the nurse had to even ask the RE to see if he could do it. So...there you have it. We will NOT being doing IUI in August/September with frozen sperm. We will NOT have a baby until at least October of 2013. Ugh. My heart is shattered and I am overwhelmed by the disappointment right now. I let the flood gates open after that call from the RE. I have already been through this waiting thing before. I waited 6 months to do any treatments. I worked so hard, lost 80 lbs, and nothing has shown for it but my health. I am not complaining, because I did a darn good job with losing weight. And now, I sit with a soggy face and eyes. I sit here dwelling on the fact that I have to wait even longer than we had thought. I sit here, trying to find some sort of positivity about our situation. And my heart is broken into a million pieces. I just want to be normal again. When am I going to feel normal?

My plan, now, is to continue losing weight. I am going to lose 40 lbs while he is gone. I am 176 right now. So that would make me 136 lbs at my goal. I might even push it and lose 47 lbs. I have to have something to keep me motivated through this deployment. I guess this means that my blog will now be turned into a weight loss blog instead of an infertility blog? And maybe, just maybe, that is what my body needs to get pregnant on it's own. For me to shed all this extra weight. To get rid of this evil stuff that makes me so self conscious. I'm ready. I'm ready. I'm ready to get this deployment over with. :(

Saturday, March 3, 2012

Weigh In, Deployment, and 9dpo

Starting: 184.6
Week one: 182.0
Week two: 180.6
Week three: 179.6(AF week)
Week four: 178.2
Week five: 179.0 (Provera week)
Week six: 180.0 (AF week)
Week seven: 179.0 (Follistim week)
Week eight: didn't track (Follistim week)
Week nine: didn't track
Week ten: 177.4 (first myfitnesspal week)

Total lost: 7.2 lbs lost.

*sigh* This seems to be taking FOREVER! I recently decided to stop using Weight Watchers and turn my efforts to counting calories with Myfitnesspal.com. Oh. My. Gosh. I LOVE this website. I can use my phone to track everything and scan bar codes of food to get the nutrition facts. It's pretty amazing. :) I'm eating 1200 cals a day. I have only lost about .4 lbs in the past week. I gave up diet soda because I felt like it was making me bloated and making me hang onto some fat, too. But, the first week of MFP went pretty great if you ask me!!

I am 9dpo today. Testing out the trigger and yesterday had a very light line so today when I take my test in the afternoon it should be BFN. Then tomorrow, a possible BFP, or Monday? :) I don't really know.

My husband is being deployed in less than 45 days. We don't know exact info yet. We don't even know where he is going but it WILL be the middle east somewhere. It came out of the blue and really upset me. But I've come to see it as God's way of telling me that I would enjoy pregnancy after losing 40 more lbs. This deployment will be 9 months long. He will leave sometime in April. I decided to look into freezing his sperm and doing IUI in September (halfway through) so if we were to get pregnant with the IUI then he would be here for all the exciting parts. :) I am still disappointed, though. I don't ever want him to leave. But that's what type of job he has and we just have to roll with the punches. By the time we have a baby, I will be nearly 27/28. And it possibly wont even be until later than that. Man, time flies!