Our TTC Journey

Monday, February 20, 2012

Not spotting any more...

Just bleeding like I would if this were to be AF. Like medium flow. This really blows. I'm feeling like this cycle is a bust. I'm trying to wrap my head around the reasons why this would happen. I have so many questions as to why Follistim would make me have this mid-cycle bleeding. I have come up with several reasons that it could be:

1. My lining is too thick, so we could call it breakthrough bleeding?
2. My E2 is way too low, so in return it would cause bleeding.
3. If I had not taken Provera, this time of month would be time for AF to arrive.
4. God says I need to wait a bit longer to be successful?

With all of these things on my mind I am going crazy. I prayed really hard last night about this situation and I asked God to please heal every inch of my body and prepare it for pregnancy to be able to get pregnant. I also prayed for him to make this bleeding stop. I trust that He will make the right decision. I am just trying my hardest to look past this situation and move onto what will be next. I know I asked God to help me have the strength and patience to lose weight, so maybe this is his way of saying, "Here's your chance, lose weight now!" I really don't know but I am doing the best I can do. I ran/walked 5 miles last night because I wanted to get my mind off of this situation. It felt rewarding after I jumped off that treadmill.

My biggest complaint about this bleeding episode is not being able to have sex when we want. My husband and I normally don't do the deed while I am on my period. We did when we first started having sex, though. Over the years, it's just annoying to do and way too messy to clean up. So with our recent trials, I had my period from Jan 15th-20th, then took Provera and got my period Feb 4th-8th. Now I have been bleeding again since Friday. It's just really annoying when you really want to be intimate with your hubby.

I just really need to train myself not to expect anything. I will accept what God has planned and just roll with it. Try not to get upset because it's not in my control. I just have to keep reminding myself....

4 comments:

  1. Just breathe. :) I know thats easier said then done. When I did IVF back in 02, I started bleeding while on estrace, which isn't suppose to happen. I of course was freaking out because we were so close to transfer and I could just see my bleeding was screwing up my lining. They changed me to a injection insted and it stopped right away. Has your Dr tried to change anything with your meds?

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    1. He did raise my Follistim dose from 75IU to 83IU but I thought it wouldn't be much of a difference. The nurse said it should stop my bleeding. My reaction to that was that it will probably take a few days for me to stop(but this thought was on Friday). And now it's gotten worse (enough to want to wear a tampon). It's just really bothering me to the point where I think about it ALL DAY LONG. 8am tomorrow can't come soon enough! Thanks for the comment ~ I really do appreciate it! *breathes*

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  2. Hoping you get some answers tomorrow. When it comes to IF one of my favorite quotes is- faith in Him includes faith in His timing. *Hugs*

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